Nice 'n' Moogy! Part Two

If you liked the last stuff with the keyboards, you'll love this! Or, perhaps, not. Long before Devo did their devo thing, there was Kraftwerk. In some ways, I suppose they could be seen as a Teutonic Devo, although, it is more probably that Devo is an American Kraftwerk. With their hypnotic music, lyrical discussions of robots in German, and snappy makeup and outfits, it makes me want to get a really skinny tie, shave my beard, slick back my hair, and move in a jerky manner. Isn't that cool? Seventies Germany rocks - so unemotional and mannequin-esque. Just like me!

Enjoy!

A fun past time for the GSHA music set - fictional band album art

Here is a way to blow some time that I discovered recently on a variety of blogs, such as this one and this one. It is a way to create a fake album cover for a fake band that you make! Follow these instructions and you will waste a ton of time, giggling, sighing, or wishing that these bands existed. If you dream it, they will come to your house and rock!

Your band name comes from a random Wikipedia article and your album title comes from the last 4 words of the last quote from a random quotation and your album art is the third on this page of random Flickr photos.

Slap it all together and you get something like this:

Martorell - they're a zeitgeisty tour-de-force that combines the post-punk intensity of Joy Division, the dual lyricism of Bernie Taupin and Lou Reed, and the full-on feedback assault of the Jesus and Mary Chain, all nicely piled up together in a sunshine pop and vocal-harmonizing wrapping of the Osmonds. Check them out this spring on tour, if you can. Enjoy!

The first Variegated Brainstem Music collection

Hello, loyal viewers! The Veeb has issued its first soundtrack CD, entitled Make the Madness Stop. It contains a variety of psyche-skewing songs for your musical aggrandizement. Tracks on this first of several collection include:

1. Stereo Phase Test - Man Or Astroman (01:04)
2. Magic People - The Paupers (02:45)
3. At The Mountains Of Madness - HP Lovecraft (04:58)
4. I Put Spell On You - Arthur Brown (03:45)
5. The year of the sun - The Gordian Knot (03:02)
6. my mind - The Misunderstood (02:35)
7. Spiral Galaxy 28948 - Hawkwind (03:47)
8. Through My Eyes - The Creation (03:07)
9. Lysergic Bliss - Of Montreal (04:04)
10. I'm A Nut - (01:02)
11. Bottle Of Wine - Fireballs (02:11)
12. Cup Of Jesus - Joel R. Cooper (02:26)
13. Sardinia - Alabama Sacred Harp Singers (02:14)
14. I live for the sun - The Sunrays (02:28)
15. Laughing Stock - Love (02:32)
16. A Chicken with Its Head Cut Off - The Magnetic Fields (02:42)
17. The Third Eye - The Dovers (02:17)
18. Happy - The Sunshine Company (01:58)
19. Trouble - Lindsey Buckingham (03:49)
20. Me - The Brain Train (02:25)
21. Groovy Summertime - The Love Generation (02:24)
22. White Cat Heat - The Godz (02:12)
23. Something In 4/4 Time - Daryl Hall (04:27)
24. You Keep Hanging up on My Mind - Wendy & Bonnie (02:59)
25. Watch out for Me Ronnie - Yo La Tengo (03:02)
26. Some People Never Know - We All Together (04:21)
plus a secret or too!

Not to toot our horns here at the VCC (Veeb Central Control), but we are pleased at how this CD flows, making everything from dish-washing to the daily commute to encounters with the rhino-hive mind something to look forward to! Drop us a line if you would like a copy. Enjoy!

Are you ready to shake your booty? European dance vids from the 1970s are what you need!

This is one of the greatest videos ever put on the internet. Can you feel it? The hypnotic beats of the band make you fall down in disco-inspired seizures.

In case the first video didn't get your toes a-tappin' and your legs a-twitching, here is a video of the great German Krautrock band Can, performing their hit "Paperhouse." If ever you wished that you could find a German band that had a Japanese singer who sang in English, all the while convulsing on stage with his jazz-rock posse high on mushrooms and schnapps, then this one is for you! Enjoy!

Fist in the air for All Your Base Are Belong to Us and the GSHA!

To my brothers and sisters, I just wanted to say that while you're out there smashing the state, don't forget to keep a smile on your lips and a song in your heart! Enjoy!

Some of my new favorite mu-suck-ial groups - part one

Every one should follow their muse and do the things that make them happy (within reason - zoosadism and pedophilia don't count). I have yet to find my overriding passion, but these folks seem to have found their's, although perhaps in ways that make the rest of us scratch our heads and go "Huh?" or "Do what?"

This first is Leslie and the Lys, the brainchild of Leslie Hall, a gold lame beehive-hairdoed lady from Iowa who envisions herself as a rap / hip-hop genius (who's to say she isn't?). Here she presents what is probably the only (that I'm aware of) musical pop tribute to the Ron Howard movie Willow:

Watching this makes me repeatedly wonder: why didn't we do stuff like this in the TA office?

I, Icarus, fall headfirst into oblivion...

It was with a heavy heart that I finally realized the extent of my descent from previous glory on the Myspace friend's list of Henry. To be sure, it means nothing concerning our friendship - it is merely a shuffling of bytes and electrons so as to appease his more fragile followers. And yet...MY RANKING ON HIS LIST WAS ALL I HAD TO LIVE FOR IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD! Sure, I shuffled it off with puckish aplomb, because that is what he'd expect of me - to be a good soldier tried and true. But, deep down, I am dead inside. When I discovered my new locale, I raced home tearfully, leaped into bed, assumed the fetal position, and turned the electric blanket up to nine (thanks Limelighters). My world fell down...

A Secret Shame that I Proudly Wear on My Sleeve!

One of the little known rock gods, albeit one without the intense political fury of The Clash or the skull-piercingly ear-damaging riffage of The Stooges, is Roger Whittaker, a South African born baritone singer whose beautiful voice has warmed middle class American livingrooms since the early 1970s. Many were the evenings when my family would joy to the sound of his records, eating Jiffy-Pop and washing it down with cola from glass bottles. Oh, how we thrilled at his jaw-droppingly exquisite take on the current MOR hits of other wimpy heavy weights, such as Anne Murray and John Denver. Oh, how we marvelled at his intense sincerity and his hyper-space speed-whistling ability. We knew that Christmas was coming with the emergence of the Roger Whittaker Christmas Album every year.

So, here are two of my favorite hits of Rog. If these don't move you to tears, you must be dead inside, you heartless bastard!

Enjoy!

Fever dreams influenced by the humidity...

"A smile is just a frown turned upside down, my friend!" Great song, but don't these people kinda freak you out in a Logan's Run coupled with The Omega Man kinda way?

Isn't this a dumb but catchy song? H-Bomb protection!

Where are they now? I would love to see a rock concert culminate with the ritualistic burning of a thousand plus My Buddy dolls, all while a Stooges-esque churning riff via Chrome propelled us into cathartic bliss!

I need some sleep and coolness...

The passing of a new but dear, dear friend of mine

Last night, after one last gasp, my phone finally gave up the ghost. No on, no off; the poor thing could not rise up with me this morning and greet the day. As I cradled him in my arms one last time, a single tear made its course down my cheek, and I was reminded of the brief but intense relationship we shared over the past few months. Although initally hostile to the idea of a phone, he won over my heart with his impish sense of humor, his roguish good looks, and his ability to remind me of upcoming events that I had long forgotten. He was with me during some important milestones in my life. He witnessed my first haircut in 17 years. He supported me and celebrated with me my successful passing of my Spanish language exam for my PhD. And, like a candle in the wind, he was snuffed out in the prime of life during a plumping operation turned deadly.

As I set him on his funeral pyre and reverently hold the torch that will momentarily send him to his glory in Vahalla, I am struck by the fact that Luddism can so quickly be overcome with technology, especially technology that connects you with other people. On a lighter note, the Razr will be long remembered in my heart, as I plan on getting a Hello Kitty version to ease my pain at the loss of such a short but intense friendship...

My latest plot (s)

I have recently discovered that I can become a licensed notary public for the state of Tennessee in a few easy steps. First, you give them the application at the county clerk's office with some money. Then you wait. Then you get a surety bond of $10,000. Then you wait. Then you get sworn in to protect and defend and all that for Tennessee. And then you wait. Then you purchase your seal, your log book, you make a sign of what fees you charge for your services, and then you start a'notarizin' and watch the money flow in like a jellyfish swarm! With all the business that I will have coming in for my services, I will be able to save enough money for my larger scheme - funding and making several C-grade, straight-to-video movies starring Jan Michael Vincent as the hapless and luckless robot jellyfish with monkey brain and his unfortunate involvement in the age old battle between the underwater Nazi mermen samurai and the green skinned, Shannon Tweed-esque women who represent the embodiment of the rhino hive mind. Tears, politics, art, death, love, sandwiches - all will be explored in the brilliantly subdued directing and editing of my epics, with enough twists and turns to keep the viewers guessing through the second six pack!

This is, without a doubt, my most inspired scheme yet. Now, I just need to scrap together a couple hundred bucks to get the notary stuff going. Plasma center, here I come!

That deaf, dumb, and blind phone sure makes a mean paper weight...

My phone can receive calls and that is it. It is a vegetable. Or maybe it is like a Delphic oracle, only speaking to me when there is a message, mute any other time. Either way, I must now find a replacement, as I have become too used to having a mobile phone (damn this drug that saps the resolve of the Luddite!). Maybe I should opt for one of those eighties Miami Vice-type gray things that are huge and really make a statement.

Homage to an old employer...

When I was a young lad, I took a job at a local restaurant in Kingsport called Pratt's Barn. They were proclaimed, by the local radio adverts, as being "THE place for Breakfast and Barbeque!" The owners had recently relinquished control over the establishment to their son, who seemed less interested in the day to day running of the place and more interested in pursuing a roustabout lifestyle with a bevy of buxom blonde and brunette bimbos, many of whom became waitresses at Pratt's. This was a wonderful selling point for working there, especially for a young lad such as myself experiencing the full assault of puberty.

However, that was about all the place had going for it. The food was alright, when the chef was sober, but the health code violations would probably have gotten us on Don Dare's program. The waitresses, while easy on the eyes and generally nice to me, tended to be bitchy and manipulative, especially when it came to their speculations as to which one of them was currently sleeping with the boss. And the managers were a group of petty micromanagers with a penchant for overcomplicating the simplest of tasks.

A giant Indian statue, made of concrete and fiberglass, stood in front of the building. One time, when I was cleaning it for spider webs, I knocked the loin cloth off. That should be on my headstone. That, or "Nobody Beats Our Meat." But that's another story for another time...

AYBABTU pre-production notes #1

I think that the first issue of this particular idea that needs to be addressed is the type of aliens necessary for such an idea as the one proposed in the previous post. The original V used reptilian humaniods as the alien form. This does not seem to go with our GSHA ideas, does it? It has to be apes! And not just any apes, but aquatic apes, that look like the Planet of the Apes apes! But here is a twist I propose: they are actually, underneath, like the alien from The Thing! We don't know who is the ape and who is the warder (emphasizing the Prisoner aspects all the more). This could also, from a financial production point of view, be used to cut down on the amount of money needed to create an entire army of aquatic apes (make-up, rubber prosthetic pieces, the whole ape look). Instead, they could look like normal people, who are actually apes (aquatic) underneath, who are actually The Thing-type creatures underneath! The creative juices are flowing and there's no stopping them, ladies and gentlemen; I feel like I've got a diesel truck battery strapped to my nads!

Great idea for new TV series!

It is rare that I pat myself on the back for my own brilliance. Indeed, I'm usually suprised at how dense I can be. However, while avoiding doing my work for school, I had the most amazingly intense fit of creative juicing since I was first inclined to start this stupid blog. What I have imagined is a new sci-fi adventure series that combines The Prisoner with V: The Miniseries. This idea has limitless possibilities, especially if set in Knoxville, using the Sunsphere as the new command post for the new Village, whatever that might end up being (we need a good session at the Bean to work out all the details). Here's the brilliant part: the show could be titled All Your Base Are Belong To Us! I'm anxious to hear from all you out there in the webosphere what you think. I think I'm onto something really special...

"Fish, and plankton, and sea greens, and protein from the sea. It's all here. Ready! Fresh as harvest day!"

One thing that always bothered me about Logan's Run is the fact that they made such a big damn deal 'bout putting a robot dude (named Box) in the movie that looked cool and sounded cool and, then, they let him go down like a chump after getting shot once by Michael York's green gas Sandman gun! He was, definitely, an unexplored character that warranted more of the limelight than he got (even though most guys were probably more concerned with Jenny Agutter's nudeness in the freezer). I think that Box should be given his own series. Maybe a sitcom where he becomes the headmaster of a bunch of lovable but irascible young scamps who can warm our hearts as Box cools their evil passions. Either that, or a kind of bloodbath machine gun foo sci-fi shoot'em-up that takes the violence of Where Eagles Dare and combines it with the cross-dressing high jinx of Some Like It Hot, all set in a world run by Box and his legion of monkey-brained robot squid soldiers! Now that's the kinda movie that needs to be made and the kinda movie that I'd pay to see!